Friday, November 25, 2005

Session # 4

Session 4: Voice in the Dark

I checked my watch: four fourty-two. If this guy was serious, I hoped he was still there.
I looked out the window of the cab and the rain was pouring harder than ever now.
Suddenly the taxi slowed to a halt.
"Well... we're here," the cab driver told me.
I glanced over toward him. "Thanks." I handed him some money and left the cab. I shut the door behind me and stood out in the roaring rain. The deli stood in front of me but it was closed at this hour. I looked to my left and my right. Everything was pretty much dark and there were a few cars parked on the street. Several street lamps lined the sidewalk. The fog was still thick and I could see my breath. It would be hours still until sunrise. No one was in sight...

"Over here."
There was a dark alley to my right. I could hear his voice come from over there. I turned to face him. His figure was concealed by the shadows and his face was in the dark. I could make out he was wearing a heavy coat and a hat. His hands were in his pockets and he was standing in the shadows of the alley.
"Come on." He motioned me to come over towards him. I thought his voice sounded hauntingly familiar to me.
I walked over to him. "Who are you? What do you want? And where's my one-hundred bucks?"
"You know... you're a fool." I could almost see him smile.
He pulled out a gun on me.
"Hey, I don't want any trouble." I raised up my hands and began to walk backwards.
"Too late buddy."
bang.

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2 Comments:

At 11/25/2005 4:55 PM, Blogger ifedajay said...

One thing: "His figure was concealed by the shadows... he was standing in the shadows"

2nd thing: the sentences are kinda short and short

3rd thing: I think (I can't remember), but I was thinking that maybe the guy was a phony...or maybe it's too predictable...I don't know...!

 
At 11/25/2005 10:38 PM, Blogger TheJBurger said...

huh well i uh.. i dunno...

i was tired and not thinking and..

i was uninspired while writing this.

so i didn't like it much either and i wrote it out of nonsense words.

 

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